(Here are things via day 14, a section held up to light)
2.
Sing to the ashes of your troubles
let them rise in a new form
with wings stronger and broader
and more brilliant than before
3.
I am in the throws of tax prep. The only bookkeeping I did last year was prep for 2020's taxes so I have literally a year's worth of work. It is tedious and I know exactly why I am not an accountant. At the same time it is not so bad. I've been doing bits at a time, making myself comfortable and cozy, not pushing myself beyond my capacity in the moment.
I have so much grace for myself as I financially unpick the year that was. It is another layer of unraveling the grief of the year. There was no way my grief filled brain and heart belonged anywhere near numbers and columns and categories at time so it is a story I am reading now, in hindsight. As I work my way through statements and receipts I realize a few of things.
One, I did not work much last year and that is blessing, even as the financial hit hurts. I had time to grieve and heal and feel into the tiny rhythms of living. It was the first time since I began working that I had extended time off without the pressure of what comes next.
Two. While the IRS may not be infinitely patient, number are. They were all still there waiting to be reconciled and accounted for. There is something comforting about this. Will I be better about keeping up with my bookkeeping going forward? I hope so. I have make this promise before and been successful to varying degrees. But even if I don't, it will all wait until I am ready.
Three. Numbers tell stories beyond a balance sheet, and in a different way than words. It shows me in a tangible and easy to see way what has importance, where my resources go, what I choose to invest in or not. Clothing last year, not a priority. Creativity supplies and support, oh my goodness, yes! My emotions do quite a dance around it all, and the numbers hold firm to their truth. A truth and a story important to know.
4.
Do you ever wish you could read your favorite books again for the first time? I love re-reading, but there is something so special about falling in love with a book as you experience it the first time.
I am reading Braiding Sweetgrass by Robin Wall Kimmerer. I could say I am finally reading it, or wished I hadn't waited so long, but then I would not be having the experience of reading it for the first time now.
5.
A blessing for your week:
