five things friday: holidays, feelings, holifeels contagion
Published: Fri, 12/16/22
December 16, 2022
Hello there,
I am not sure I am feeling more pressure to get all the holiday things finished, or
get my year wrapped up in a tidy bow and the new year visioned and planned into blissful success and ease. I do pretty well at keeping my expectations reasonable and myself well grounded, but then all of a sudden I find myself caught in a realm of holiday/end-of-year-frenzy and overwhelm. I'm calling it catching the overholifeels, as opposed to the cozyholifeels which is more likely to involve hot chocolate and
some tree gazing.
But emotion contagion is real for those of us sensitive types. If you are also feeling swept away by feelings and emotions you are not sure are fully yours, here are few things that may help you let go of what is not yours so you can attend fully to what is.
1. Name it. Name the emotions you are feeling, all of them without judging them as good or bad judgment. Give all of your experience space to be. I reach for
this a lot to help me identify the nuances of my feelings, especially when I'm in a swirl. It's like getting an overview of the game board. It is also kind to acknowledge how you feel, even when it is award or uncomfortable or makes no logical sense.
Yesterday I was a bundle of cranky, melancholy, and curious, with flashes of satisfaction. Today so far: contentment, expectation, and focus, with just an tiny edge of annoyance.
For a more on why naming your emotions and having a good emotional vocabulary is important and oh so useful this will give you more insight. Both lists are courtesy of the ever brilliant Karla McLaren.
2. Ask yourself, "Are these emotions, these
expectations, are they mine or someone else's?" Don't over think it, your first instinct is good. Maybe you don't know, but asking the question signals your psyche that you want to. It begins building a boundary between your emotional experience and another's.
3. Speaking of boundaries, notice what you are unwilling to say "no" to. This is an old coaching prompt that reveals where you may not have the boundaries you need. Doing all the holiday planing and shopping? Baking 25 different kinds of cookies because you always have? Saying yes to all the invitations, to all the parties, gatherings, lunches, brunches, ornament exchanges?
Setting goals, resolutions, visions, etc. for the New Year?
Nothing is wrong with any of these or the many other always "yeses" you may have in your life. But, if there is no ability to say no there is no ability
to choose something different that may align more with what is important to you now.
4.
What is your intention? Is what you are doing bringing you closer or further away from it? If I am swept up in the energy of the frenzied expectations of the season or the intensity of those around me I lose myself, what I want, what I need, what is important to me. Taking a moment to connect to my intention connects me to my desire and is gives me a compass to navigate with.
My intention?
Cultivating cozyholifeels. No pictures to show, yet, but the feelings are coming soon, I am sure of it. May you have many, many of them too.
5.
A blessing for your week:
(From the Shadowscapes Tarot by Stephanie Pui-Mun Law and Barbara Moore)
May what is important be clear, may what is not be released, may devotion to wholeness guide your discernment.
Until next time, Sandi
Coming soon...
I'm noodling on
a little thing something. A guide to entering the New Year in a gentle way. In a way lets the elements carry us, inform us, inspire us to build a nourishing foundation for 2023.
