Where I forget and then remeber that love trumps suffering.

Dear Luscious One,

I got a massage yesterday. A lovely, very, very, verrrry overdue massage. It was a gift from a dear friend which added another layer of nourishing love to the experience.

My body has been tight and sore, but I was carrying on, as we so often do. Carry on in spite of discomfort, only stopping when pain forces the issue, and sometimes not even then. Things need doing, right?

Luckily, my friend, so much wiser than me in these things, stepped in and said the "no" to my pain I was unwilling to say.

One Yelp search, a credit card, and few days latter found me on the fanciest massage table ever. (Seriously, this thing adjusted in the middle stretching and taking all pressure off my low back!) The masseuse was skilled, attentive, nurturing. The perfect balance of mamma earth love and clinical prowess. I left feeling renewed.

As I drove home I realized that something deeper was going on than just experiencing the afterglow of a good rub down.

The colors of the world were brighter and cleaner. The sunshine bounced and sparkled. My mind was clear, focused, but at the same time spacious and expanded. I was in a really sweet spot of grounded bliss where the beauty of the world could seep into my being and realign me with myself.

Here is where I realized how much my worry, pain, and plain old gotta-get-it-done living had built up a hardened shell around my soft bellied, animal bodied self. I had become numbed to the sensual world with out really noticing. Or more accurately, with out noticing how much.

I found myself at a cross roads.

I could make myself wrong for getting so far down the road of self neglect, judge myself harshly for not flawlessly living what Luscious Life coaching stands for, in general make myself feel really bad about not being perfect. I could drown the wonderful experience of the message with guilt and suffering.

Or, I could breathe in the beauty and sensuality I was present to as if it were fresh air entering the lungs of an oxygen deprived soul. I could relax in my body and sink into love and appreciation for my friend. I could forgive myself for forgetting to honor myself in the face of the fast paced urgency of life.

I am happy to say I chose the latter. To embrace the sweetness of the moment, remembering and returning more fully to myself. I let myself breathe in the grace of friendship, the sensuousness of the world, and the space to be imperfect in finding my way to the deeper, more real relationship with myself and my life.

We often find ourselves at these cross roads. We choose to punish ourselves in some form- thinking it is what we deserve or that it will shame us into doing better. Or, we choose to love ourselves into more of who are are becoming, even and especially when faced with our shortcomings.

Which way do you choose? (Hint, the latter is way more pleasurable and effective. You can honor the sensualist and the pragmatist in you!)

A luscious life is choosing more and more often the way of love. The way of compassion. The way of beauty. For ourselves.

The next time you are at the cross roads of self punishment and self love, I wish you ease in choosing self love.

Until next time,

Sandi

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