Luscious Soulful Beauty: Where I share about my love of self portraits and why-July 24,
2014
Hello Creative Beauty,
Back in my college art class days I drew, etched, lithographed and woodblocked many self portraits. Being an accepted artistic practice, there was nothing strange or self involved about staring at ones reflection
in a mirror and creating from it.
I found it wonderfully liberating to relate to my face as an artistic exercise; a living, exploration of form, space, shadow and line. I got up close and intimate with the shape of my eyes, the curve of my lips, the roundness of my cheeks, the texture of my hair. Not in the beauty magazine way, analyzing in order to change and standardize in order to improve. But as a way
to capture the life and soul giving breath to those eyes, lips, cheeks and hair. To capture a moment of lived experience in visual form. I saw into myself in new ways. Sometimes not conventional or pretty but always real. While I don't posses huge artistic talent, I developed a fair amount of skill and I can look at these portraits as art. My art. My expression.
In the 30+ years since, I have not lost my
fascination with self portraiture. I love exploring my image, my face, my being, through art- these days with my 8 year old Sony point and click camera and some free photo editing software.
Now we are in the age of selfies. So much is said about whether taking pictures of ourselves and posting them for others to see is dangerous narcissism, healing therapy or artistic expression. All are true depending on
the context and intention.
However, in this environment I realized I have been been dismissing my photographic self portraits. I have seen them, not as art or deep expression, but as a self indulgent waste I should not spend so much time with. Unless, of course they have a purpose. If they illustrate a point, have a reason outside of themselves to exists, like my blog series from last year.
You see, I don't have a fancy camera, or an iPhone. I don't have special Photoshop skills. I happen upon interesting images more though mistakes of trial and error than knowing what I am doing.
What I do can't be Art, right? Wrong! I am calling big font, bold, BULL SHIT! on this.
This way of diminishing my creative self, this way of marginalizing my expression. This
way of telling myself that what I have to say in the way I want and have access to is not good enough.
I have great tools. Just not the ones my inner snotty art critic deems acceptable. I have a great eye. I know what work is good regardless of how I get there (as if the most important criteria of art making is knowing what exactly it is going to be before starting).
So I deem my self portraits Art. One of the many expressions of my Art. To others liking or not is not relevant. Even if my work is bad, bad art is still art. It is claiming my expression that frees my power.
Where do you want to claim more of your creative self?
My favorite thing is to coach women on their creative expression and longings.
Why?
Because I find this push pull around what is creative, what is art, whether or not we can or should or
what is the right way to express our desire and inspiration, this so, so, so often is at the crux of our sacred feminine power and embodiment.
Because I know how restrictive and painful it is to have this part of us blocked, often scared to be seen.
Because I hate to see the bright fire of our life essence dimmed by judgment and fear.
Because I know how essential it is for our creative life, what ever form it takes, to flow through us.
Because I know the power and clarity, the pure joy and bliss it leads to.
Because our creative selves life are life affirming.
Because every creative act changes us.
But first you and I have to smell the bullshit we are so use to smelling we don't even notice it anymore. The lies that say we are not good enough or experienced enough or talented enough to enjoy our own creative passions freely.
I wouldn't be honest if I told you I could do this all on my own. I need help from other souls I trust, who see me and remind me of my creative truth when I forget. We all need help. Seeing the truth of ourselves. Trusting the creative urge.
If you know there is creative fire in you and it is time to let it burn, I have ways to help.
If we are not connected on Facebook, Twitter, or Pinterest, friend and follow me and let's stoke
creative fire! Of course we will continue to meet up here in this email space.
I'll keep talking luscious life, creative fire, mystic magic alchemy, and you let me know what is in your heart. Just hit reply.
All love and no bullshit,
Sandi
