Luscious Soulful Beauty:

December 16, 2016.

Hello Beautiful,

My words are strong. Much stronger than I feel sometimes. I worry I will not live up to them. I wonder how I will find my way through a world of ever more complected paradox. I weep spontaneous tears of grief and wonder, often at inconvenient times.I capture moments of beauty with my camera like a lifeline to a truth about the world I fear is getting lost in these times where hate and tragedy seem to be growing and getting the upper hand. 

I slide back and forth, in and out, of hope and despair. And it is exactly here, the slippery in between where the change happens. Where the known breaks apart and something new must come forth.

This is the sacred ground of me. The place where it all falls apart becomes the place where it will next come together.

There is something being forged within and it is not forming gracefully with clarity and an instruction manual. It is churning and scary and confusing and oh so uncomfortable! It is very much in the mystery. It is life dying so it can renew again, demanding attention and to feel it all, honing my wisdom along the way.

This is the place of the breath of life, the creative vortex, the eye of God, the cosmic womb that holds All. 

It is wild and eternal.

And then there is the laundry needing to be done, the taxes to pay, the presents to buy and the cookies to bake. Does the tree have enough water? Damn, we are out to stamps again. The pieces and particles of day to day life to keep in place as the rest spins and wobbles.

It all feels too much. The work of the world, the mundane of life, the evolving of the soul, the becoming of the heart. When the to-do list is impossibly long and the world is so loud and harsh I loose the way home to myself.

I know I am not alone. I have talked to too many women of grit and heart to indulge the illusion that I am some kind of weak creature who can not handle life and am too easily overwhelmed. The truth is, I am sensitive. Really sensitive. Even delicate at times. I need tender care and gentleness, especially from myself. Sometimes when life is too much I cocoon myself from the world and indulge in comforting things. This does not make me, or you if you see yourself in anyway here, weak. Or flawed. It means we are human. And that we require rest and pleasure and a soft place to nourish and return to ourselves. The flesh and spirit of us requires it.

But then, we rise. We expand. We enter the fray stronger, with resilience. Our radiance and capacity renewed and deepened. We become more of ourselves and this changes the world.

This is the rhythm. The heartbeat of the heavens, the breath of the earth. The darkness giving way to light giving way to the dark again. The breaking apart and forming newly. Each cycle bringing us more and more into our essential self, our elemental nature. It is easy to forget when tired and depleted that chaos will always find its flow again. That the light and the dark and how we travel through both reveal our truth. 

We are approaching the darkest time of the year here in the northern hemisphere and many are feeling the weight of waning light. Holiday glitz and pressure are ramping up and the end of the year is fast approaching with all of its crazy making madness, stress and fun. And the world. Breaking apart and and in such pain. In the midst of it all are unmistakable moments of beauty and grace. Humanity at its best, generosity and abundance freely shared. It will crack us wide open if we let it and this is the gift. This is the place where we feel it all the way down in our bones, where our flesh is changed, where we become new again.

Do the devotional work of taking care of you. Allow yourself to be cracked open, whether through your own doubt, world events, or small moments of poignancy and joy. Cocoon and take in pleasure. Answer the holy call of finding your way through the chaos so you can live in the beauty. 

You are sacred ground. It all happens here.

Merry, Happy, Wondrous Holidays!

Sandi